Skip to content

Porn vs Marriage

March 11, 2012

On Friday I talked about Garth Zietsman’s discussion of porn usage. I interpreted his results in a pro-marriage, anti-porn fashion. But I should acknowledge that Zietsman’s own take would be more to the liking of many readers of ‘manosphere’ blogs.

The sociological and religious critique would say, correctly, that porn undermines the value of monogamy, marriage, children and a certain kind of staid vanilla sexuality. However they assume that these things are all indisputably good, or better than the alternatives. The Smart Vote (direction of difference between intelligent and stupid opinion) strongly contradicts that assumption. It says not getting married, cohabiting and having fewer children (both in and out of wedlock) are the smarter things to do.

Smart Vote sounds like a heavy porn user. I’ll have to come back to this at more length on another occasion, but honesty requires a clear acknowledgment that porn is driving a lot of the sympathy for the no-marriage cause in the first place. First because of the unhealthy attitudes porn use cultivates in men, and second because competition from porn has caused women to act sluttier, and hence made them less appealing as marriage prospects. Part of making marriage more appealing is ridding ourselves of porn. And unless we want all of Western society to be afflicted by the pathologies of black culture, we should want marriage to be more attractive. Rooting for porn plus better access to more sluts is not a serious alternative position. It’s just selfish—and ultimately self-defeating.

*     *     *

And since it’s Sunday, here’s Paul on marriage (Ephesians 5:22–33):

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: